Killer The Keemstar (A Jeff The Killer Parody)
by The Classy Walrus
Summary: NOTE: DO NOT GO AND WITCH HUNT ANY OF THE CHARACTERS DEPICTED IN THIS FANFIC! THIS WAS MADE AS A PARODY Keemstar is a Youtuber who moved house with his family, Alex, Jinx and Nicole Arbor. Sadly for Keemstar, he comes across 3 other Youtubers who break him to the news reporter we know today.


Disclaimer: This is meant to be a parody of Jeff the Killer and Keemstar and is not to be taken seriously. Don't go attacking anyone mentioned in this fanfic.

Excerpt from local YouTube channel:

OMINOUS GNOME DOXER STILL AT LARGE #DRAMAALERT POLICE DON'T KNOW WHO IT IS? PEWDIEPIE

After weeks of unexplained doxings, the ominous news reporter is still at large. After little to no evidence was found, the police started to blame Scarce. Until a young squeaker came forward and told his tale.

"I jolted up in the middle of the night after a day of watching minecraft vids." Says the boy. "I saw for some reason my window was open, even though I remember it being closed before mass flagging videos via YouTube Heroes. I got up, closed it and tried to go back to bed. That's when I had a strange feeling, that I was being harassed. I logged onto my Twitter account and what I saw nearly made me jump out of my bed. There in my account, was a user who uploaded all my personal information, my name, my address, my phone number, my email, my bank details, the list goes on and on. That was when another message appeared, 'Look out your window.' I turned and looked out, there in the little ray of light coming from my phone, I saw a snapback, a dark, stupid snapback. That's when I saw his goatee, that cringey, creepy gnome goatee, it terrified the shit out of me. The man just stared at me, licking his lips. What seemed like forever, he spoke, a simple phrase, only a way a rat king could say it."

"He said, 'Let's get roooooiiiiiight into the news!' I let out a scream, and that's what sent him to attack my Twitter page. He sent allegations towards me. I deleted the posts, sent him money and reported him, trying to stop the allegations. That's when my dad busted in. The man threw a racist comment at him. He would've made a live stream on Blog TV if the neighbours didn't contact the police."

"They drove into the parking lot, and ran towards the door. The man turned and stupidly danced down the hallway. I then heard a song, like a news channel theme. As I came out of my room, I saw the computer that was in the living room was playing the DramaAlert theme. I looked out the window to see him vanish into the distance. I can tell you one thing, I will never forget that goatee. That stupid, gnome looking goatee. It will never leave my mind."

The police are certain that it was Tyblue. If you see him, contact your local police department or news channel. DramaAlert Nation, now over 1,581,000 subscriberrrrrrrrrs.

Keemstar and his family moved into a new neighbourhood. His dad, Jinx promoted himself at work, "reacting," and they thought it would be best to live in one of those "Dramatic" neighborhoods. Keemstar and his brother, Alex, couldn't complain. A new, larger Channel, what's not to love. As they were setting up their YouTube setup, one of the neighbors came up to them.

"Hi." She said. "I'm Sssniperwolf. I live across the street from you. Well, I just wanted to introduce myself and my son." She turns and calls her son. "Misha. These people are new YouTubers." Misha called them cancer and ran back to play Pokemon Go in his garden.

"Well," said Keem's mother. "I'm Nicole Arbor, this is my husband, Jinx, and my 2 sons, Daniel and Alex." They introduced themselves and then Sssniperworlf invited them to Comic-Con for Misha's birthday. Keemstar and Alex were about to object, when Nicole said that they would love to go. When Keem and his family were done setting up, Keemstar went up and confronted his mom.

"You stupid abusing bitch! Why did you invite me and Alex to a kid's party. If you haven't known, I'm not 8, I'm 34!"

"Daniel!" Nicole shouted, "How dare you call me that! And we just moved here, we need show that we want to collab with our fellow YouTubers. Now, we're going to Comic-Con and that's that! Capesh?" Keemstar was about to rant but stopped himself, he knew he couldn't do anything because when his mom said something, it was true, I mean this is the same woman who said she can pass any lie detector. He walked up to his recording studio, sat down on his chair and ate some popcorn. He sat there looking at his MSI computer when suddenly, he got a weird feeling. Not so much as a pain, but a weird feeling, like he had to report someone. He dismissed it as just some random Drama. He then heard his mother call him to grab his Gfuel, and he walked down the stairs to get it.

The next day, Keemstar walked down the stairs to get his breakfast, he had popcorn mixed with Gfuel. He ate his breakfast and he got ready for a day of making YouTube videos. As he was getting ready, he once again got that feeling. This time it was stronger. It gave him a slight tugging pain, but he dismissed it as an erection. As he and Alex finished getting ready, they walked down to the bus stop. They sat there waiting for the bus, Keemstar put his headphones on and listened to his favourite song. "Dollar in the woods." But suddenly, some YouTubers started harassing them on Twitter. Both Keemstar and Alex glanced in shock. "Hey, who's doing this shit?!" Keem yelled. He turned and saw 3 YouTubers.

"Well, well, well. Looks like we got a new channel on YouTube." 2 other YouTubers came from behind the first. "Well, since you're smaller channels I would like to introduce ourselves. That's GradeAunderA." Keemstar and Alex looked at the skinny guy. He had a big chin that you would expect a cartoon character made with MS paint to have. "And he's Leafyishere." They looked over at the guy with no chin. Talk about a cyberbully. This guy looked like he made fun of a kid 2 hours ago.

"And I." Said the first guy. "Am iDubbbz. Now, for all the YouTubers on this site we must check your content. Now, let me see your videos." Alex stood up, ready to make an expose video when one of his friends pulled a phone out and logged onto YouTube. "Tsk, tsk, tsk, I had hoped you would be more cooperative, but it seems we must do this the hard way." iDubbbz put a police cap on, went to Alex's channel and took his monitization off of his videos. Keemstar got that feeling again. Now, it was truly strong; a reporting sensation. He stood up, but Alex gestured him to sit down. Keemstar ignored him and walked up to iDubbbz, leafy and GradeA.

"Listen here you righteous fucking assholes , give back Alex's monetization or else." iDubbbz claimed his stolen money and pulled out his own phone.

"Oh? And what are you gonna do?" Just as he finished the sentence, Keemstar took Alex's phone and gave out iDubbbz's personal details. As iDubbbz reached for the delete button, Keemstar grabbed his phone and broke it. iDubbbz screamed in rage. Leafy and GradeA rushed to Twitter, but Keemstar was fast as fuck boy. GradeAUnderA attacked him on Twitter, but Keemstar removed the tweet and made a video exposing him. Leafy rushed to help GradeA, but Keemstar didn't even need a true story on Leafy. He just called leafy a pedophile and leafy's followers started to go down. Alex could do nothing but look shocked at Keemstar.

"Daniel, the fuck did you?" that was all Alex said. They saw the bus coming and knew they'd be exposed. So they started running fast... As... Fuck. As they ran, they looked back and saw the bus driver rushing over to iDubbbz and the others. As Keemstar and Alex made it to YouTube Headquarters, they didn't dare make a video on what happened. All they did was sit and make videos. Alex just kept thinking about his brother doxing YouTubers, but Keemstar knew it was more. It was something, scary. As he got that feeling he felt how great it was, the urge to just, dox someone. He didn't like how it sounded, but he couldn't help but feel... Famous. He felt that strange feeling go away, and stay away for the entire day. Even as he walked home due to the whole thing near the bus stop, and how now he probably won't be taking the bus anymore, he felt happy. When he got home his parents asked him how his day was, and he said, in a somewhat cancer inducing voice, "It was horrible, people on Twitter hate me. Why am I getting hate?!." The next morning, he heard a knock on the door. He walked down to find two people who claim they were part of the YouTube team at the door, Nicole Arbor was looking back at him with a pissed off look.

"Daniel, the YouTube team has told me that you caused some Drama with three fellow YouTubers. That it wasn't regular Drama, and that they were doxed. Doxed, son!" Keemstar's gaze fell to the floor, showing his mother that he had been exposed.

"You stupid bitch, they were the ones who stole Alex's monetization and started harassing me and Alex."

"Son," said one of the YouTube representatives, "We found three YouTubers, one doxed, one exposed and one falsely accused, and we have witnesses proving that you fled the scene. Now, what does that tell us?" Keemstar knew it was no use. He could say him and Alex had been harassed, but then there was no proof. They couldn't say that they weren't fleeing, because truth be told they were. So Keemstar couldn't stop the allegations.

"Gnome, call down your brother." Keemstar couldn't do it, since it was him who ruined those YouTubers careers.

"It...it was me. I was the one who doxed them. Alex did fuck all to hold me back, but it didn't work." The YouTube representatives looked at each other and they both nodded.

"Well Keem, looks like your channel is being shut down."

"Hold it!" says Alex. They all looked up to see Alex logged onto YouTube about to post an exposed video. The officers pulled their "super tools" on Alex.

"It was me, I exposed those pricks. Have the tweets to prove it." He logged onto Twitter to reveal tweets from Alex, as if he was involved in some drama.

"Son, just don't post the video," said the YouTube "Hero". Alex dropped the laptop, it hit the ground. He put his hands up and walked over to the YouTube team.

"No Alex, don't steal something that I did! It was me!" Keemstar's face was hot as fire.

"Huh, sad gnome. Trying to steal for what I did. Well, take me away." The YouTube team led Alex out to the YT car.

"Alex, tell them it was me! You stupid Ni..." Keem's mother put her man beating hands on his shoulders.

"Daniel, please, stop lying. We know it's Alex, just shut up." Keemstar watched helplessly as the YT car goes over the speed limit with Alex inside. A few minutes later, Jinx pulled into the driveway, seeing Keem's face, something was wrong.

"Nicole, what has this fat shit done?" Keemstar wanted to shout at him, but his vocal cords were strained from screaming. Nicole walked over to his father inside to break the bad news to him as Keemstar screamed in the driveway. After a few days or so, Keemstar walked back into the house, seeing that his parents were both shocked, sad, and disappointed. He couldn't look at them. He couldn't see how they thought of Alex when it was his fault. He just went to make a video, trying to get the whole thing off his mind. Two days went by, with no word from Alex. As Alex's channel was taken down, he had no choice but to move to . No friends to collab with. Nothing but exposure and shame. That is until Saturday, when Keemstar was woken up by his mother, with a happy, sunshiny face, the kinda face she gave when she insulted fat people.

"Daniel, get ready you fat piece of shit." Nicole said as she opened up the curtains and let light burn Keemstar's face.

"Why should I you insulting ass?" asked Keemstar as he jolts out of bed.

"It's Misha's party." He was now fully awake.

"Are you fucking stupid? You don't expect me to go to Comic-Con after..." There was a long pause.

"Daniel, we both know what happened. I think Comic-Con could be the thing that brightens up the past days. Now, get dressed." Keem's mother walked out of the room and downstairs to get herself ready. He walked over to his cupboard and picked out a random beanie and a pair of sunglasses and walked down stairs. He saw his mother and father all dressed up; his mother in a dress and his father in a suit. He thought, why they would ever wear such fancy clothes to a convention?

"Son, are you sure you wanna go out looking like a chav?" said Daniel's mom.

"Better than being a slut." he said. His mother pushed down the feeling to beat his ass and hid it with a smile.

"Now fat slob, we need to dress smartly so that we make an impression." said Jinx. Keem snorted and went back up to his room.

"I don't have any fancy clothes!" he yelled down stairs.

"Just pick something out." His mother called. He looked around in his wardrobe for something to wear that isn't cancerous. He found a black snap back he had for special occasions and a shirt. He couldn't find any dress pants that went with the shirt. He looked around and found a pair of jeans that he wore when he fought Pittsburgh. He put it on and went downstairs.

"You're wearing that?" They both said. Nicole Arbour looked at her watch. "Shit, no time to change. Let's just go." She said as she kicked Keemstar and Jinx out the door. They drove for about an hour until they reached Comic-Con. As they walked into the building, all that Keemstar could see were adults, no kids.

"The kids are around the corner. Keem, how about you go and meet some of them?" said Sssniperwolf.

Keemstar walked around the corner and saw that it was full of kids. They were running around lip syncing to music. He might as well be logging into . Suddenly a kid came up to him and handed him a camera and a script.

"Hey. Wanna do some kissing pranks?" he said.

"Fuck off kid. I don't like that kind of content." The kid looked at him with that weird sympathetic face.

"Please. It's just a social experiment." Said the kid. "Fine," said Keemstar. He took the camera and started to make out with a random woman. At first he thought it was totally fake, but then he started to actually have fun. It might not have been realistic, but it was the first time he had done something that took his mind off Alex. So he French kissed women for a while, until he heard a noise. Like footsteps. Then he saw them. IDubbbz, GradeAUnderA, and LeafyisHere all walked into the building. Keemstar dropped the camera and pushed the bitch off his lips. IDubbbz looked at Keemstar with a fiery hatred.

"Hello, Keemstar, am I not mistaken?" he said. "We have some unfinished business." Keemstar saw IDubbbz's broken phone. "What the fuck are you on about? I held your channels hostage, and you get my brother sent to Tubidy. That makes us even"

IDubbbz then put his police cap on. "Even? I make sure that every content on YouTube is good. You may have doxed us that day, but today, YOU WILL BE EXPOSED!" As he said that, IDubbbz rushed at Keem's Twitter. There was internet beef. IDubbbz called Keem a racist, and Keemstar released iDubbbz's details. IDubbbz then quickly deleted the tweet and released Keemstar's address. Kids were on their phones, joining in with the Drama. GradeA and Leafy both pulled out their phones.

"No one interrupts or tweets will fly!" they said. IDubbbz then made a parody song about Keemstar and people started to unfollow Keemstar.

Keemstar screamed with rage. IDubbbz started laughing in the face. After three seconds, Keemstar grabbed his phone and smashed it. Unfortunately, iDubbbz had another one. Leafy then pushed Keem.

"Need some help?" IDubbbz then helped Keemstar up and found a place to sit to continued their battle. As Keemstar tried to make a video, iDubbbz then made a response video, Keemstar started to cry.

"Come on you stupid Gnome, just quit!" He screams at Keemstar, he goes into a shop. He needed a drink from all that screaming.

"Come on Keem, just give up!" Keemstar glances up, his face was red like blood. "I was the one who took your brother's monetization! And now you're just gonna sit here and let him rot on ! You should be ashamed!" That did it, something in Keemstar snapped, there is only one thing he could now, dox people. He grabs iDubbbz's phone and he threw it on the ground. He then takes his phone out and makes Twitter videos. The videos causes iDubbbz's subs to decrease. As iDubbbz looks at his final Subscriber. Keemstar reports the "news." He see's his one subscribe leave, and his channel dies.

Everyone was shocked at Keemstar. The parents were trying to expose him, the 12 year olds subscribed to him, and GradeAUnderA and LeafyisHere witnessing the death of someone's channel. Although they easily break from their gaze and led their fingers towards their phones. Keemstar notices they were on Twitter and logs on himself. As he logs on, GradeA and Leafy let out an expose tweet on him, each post getting attacked by Keem's 12 year old fanboys. Keemstar heads to Leafy's page, thanking his fans. He notices that Leafy and GradeA were taking pictures of Keemstar. As they were about to press the send button, Keemstar grabs there phone's and deletes the picture. He then dashes into the bathroom. GradeA and Leafy race in, cameras ready.

Leafy records Keemstar, who grabbed his phone, stopped the recording and deletes his Twitter account. Leafy takes a swing at Keemstar but he dodged and threw a punch to LeafyisHere's face, knocking him out. It was just Keemstar and GradeA, shit was about to get real. GradeA logged out of Twitter and into YouTube, he was going to make an exposed video. He finished recording until Keemstar broke his phone. Keemstar let out an OMINOUS smile at GradeAUnderA, until he noticed GradeA's smile.

"What are you smiling at?" asked Keemstar. GradeA reached out and grabbed Leafy's phone. "Nothing much," he said, "Just that you forgot to break Leafy's phone." Keemstar's eyes widened as GradeA made a Twitter post about him. As soon as he posted it, Keemstar let out a scream. He tried to delete the post but other people copied the post, and made him a living joke. He ran down the hall, and fell. Everybody started screaming as they saw Keemstar, now a fallen man, drop to the ground. The last thing Keemstar saw was his mother and the other parents trying to extinguish the flame, not knowing that there was no fire to put out, so they were stomping on him. That's when he passed out.

When Keem woke up, he had a cast wrapped around his face. He couldn't see anything, but he felt a cast on his shoulder, and stitches all over his body. He tried to stand up, but he realized that there was a tube up his ass, and when he tried to get up it fell out, and a nurse rushed in.

"I don't think you can get out of bed just yet." she said as she put him back in his bed and re-inserted the tube, Keemstar let out a faint moan. He sat there, with no vision, no idea of what his surroundings were. Finally, after hours, he heard his mother.

"For fuck sake Dan! You scared the shit out of everyone!" she said. Keemstar couldn't answer though, his face was covered, and he was unable to speak... Thank God. "Oh, and guess what. After all the witnesses told the YouTube team that iDubbbz tried to dox you, they decided to let Alex back onto YouTube." This made Keemstar almost bolt up, stopping halfway, remembering the tube coming out of his ass. "He'll be back by tomorrow, and then you two will be able to collaborate together."

Keem's mother hugs Keemstar and says her goodbyes. The next couple of weeks were those where Keemstar was visited by his family. Then came the day where his bandages were to be removed. His family were all there to see it, what he would look like. As the doctors unwrapped the bandages from Keem's face everyone was on the edge of their seats. They waited until the last bandage holding the cover over his face was almost removed.

"Let's hope for the worst," said the doctor. He quickly pulls the cloth; letting the rest fall from Keemstar's face.

Nicole Arbor screams at the sight of his face. Alex and Jinx threw up at the sight of Keemstar's face.

"What? What happened to my face?" Keemstar said. He rushed out of bed and ran to the bathroom. He looked in the conveniently placed mirror and saw the cause of the distress. His face. It... it's horrible. He looked much more fatter than he did before, his face resembled more of a rat than a person, and his beard was more bigger and looked like a garden gnome. He slowly turned back to his family, then back to the mirror

"Daniel," said Alex, "Maybe if you shave, it wouldn't look that bad..."

"Wouldn't look that bad?" said Keemstar, "It's already perfect!" His family were equally surprised. Keemstar started laughing uncontrollably and touching his goatee. His parents noticed that his left eye and hand were twitching.

"Uh... Daniel, are you okay?"

"Okay? I've never felt more happy! Hahahahahahaaaaaa, look at me. This style is perfect for YouTube!" He couldn't stop laughing. He stroked his face feeling it. Looking at it in the mirror. What caused this you probably won't be asking and you already bloody know. When Keemstar was in a Twitter battle with iDubbbz, his sanity snapped. Now he was left as a crazy news reporter, that his parents didn't know.

"Doctor," said Nicole Arbor, "My son isn't cancerous, you know. His content?"

"Oh yes, this behavior is common for patients that have taken very large amounts of crack. If his behavior doesn't change in a few weeks, bring him back here, and we'll give him a psychological test."

"Oh that's just great, doctor." Nicole Arbor said sarcastically, she then went over to Keemstar "Daniel, let's get out of here."

Keemstar looks away from the mirror, his face still formed into a crazy smile. "Kay mommy. TWITTER BATTLES! EXPOSE VIDEOS! FALSE PEDO ALLEGATIONS!" His mother grabbed him by the shoulder and took him to get his clothes.

"This is what came in," said the lady at the desk. Nicole looked down to see the black snap back, shirt and jeans her son wore. Nicole led him to his room and made him put his clothes on. Then they left, not knowing that this was their final day on YouTube.

Later that night, Nicole woke to a sound coming from the bathroom. It was a buzzing sound, like from an electronic device. She slowly walked over to see what it was. When she looked into the bathroom she saw a horrendous sight. Keemstar had taken a razor and cut his goatee to look more like a gnome's beard.

"Daniel, what are you doing?" asked Nicole.

Keemstar looked over to Nicole. "It didn't look right. It took complete concentration, now it resembles a gnome perfectly." Nicole noticed that his content changed.

"Daniel, your content!" His content seemed to cause more drama than reduce it.

"I needed to change it. I'm not enjoying what I used to do but this content makes me more... Money." Nicole slowly started to back away, seeing that her son was going insane. "What's wrong mommy? Aren't I famous?"

"Yes son," she said, "Yes you are. L-let me go get daddy, so he can see your brilliant content." She ran into her room and shook Jinx from his sleep. "Honey, get the YouTube team, Daniel..." She stopped as she saw Keemstar in the doorway, holding a phone.

"Lets get roooooiiiiiiiiight into the news." That's the last thing they hear as Keemstar rushes onto Twitter, "Exposing" them both.

His brother Alex woke up, startled by some noise. He didn't hear anything else, so he just shut his eyes and tried to go back to sleep. As he was on the border of slumber, he got the strangest feeling that someone was watching him. He looked up, before Keemstar's hand covered his mouth. He slowly raised a webcam ready to make a live stream. Alex thrashed here and there trying to escape Keemstar's grip.

"Shhhhhhh," Keemstar whispered. "I'm on blog TV with my fucking hands up."

"Alex is doing this shit."


End file.
